The Shoutbox Adventures!

Okay, so I decided to make this a regular thing. Every now and then when I’m on the shoutbox. I will randomly tell everybody online to pick a random number between 1 and however many people are online. I will then pick one of these random numbers and they will be the active player of a random shoutbox text adventure.

Each one will then be posted into this topic for archive references, if anybody ever wants to read them again. I will be the game master of all Shoutbox Adventures.

You will be asked to give a name, age and a difficulty. You may only select one of the difficulties offered.

If you should win, you will receive a prize appropriate to the difficulty played.

  • Easy - 50 Forum Points.
  • Normal - 75 Forum Points.
  • Hard - 150 Forum Points.
  • Insane - 1000 Forum Points.

The overall goal of each text adventure is to simply survive. Unless stated otherwise.

FOR THOSE OF YOU WHO HAVE NEVER PLAYED A TEXT ADVENTURE, bare in mind the following common actions : Look Around, Look Inside of #, Examine #, Open #. Etc.

Feel free to suggest random titles from which I may make games out of.

Past Players:

Player                      Difficulty                Status

Viper                        Insane                   Died

  • Matthew -               Insane                   Died

Artix                         Normal                   Died

Viper’s Prison Adventure.

! ```
[THE-KRIS] [03:33 pm] : You wake up, in an empty prison shower room
[THE-KRIS] [03:33 pm] : soaking wet, your butt covered in soap
[THE-KRIS] [03:33 pm] : a big black guy walks in
[THE-KRIS] [03:33 pm] : what do you do?
! Viper. [03:33 pm] : HAHA
! [THE-KRIS] [03:34 pm] : You laugh at the black guy
[THE-KRIS] [03:34 pm] : he looks at you angrily.
[THE-KRIS] [03:34 pm] : What do you do?
! Viper. [03:34 pm] : Say: Dude, I can’t believe I’m not dead. I ate so much glass it must be stuck in my back passage, its cutting me like a razor.
[THE-KRIS] [03:34 pm] : The black guy looks at you, doesn’t say a word. just stares.
! Viper. [03:35 pm] : Viper urinates
Viper. [03:35 pm] : All over the black man’s feet.
! [THE-KRIS] [03:35 pm] : You begin to realise that this was your cell mate. The guy who through your ass in the shower after you got the shit kicked out of you for stealing a cigarette off the mexicans
[THE-KRIS] [03:35 pm] : As you piss on the black guys feet, he female dog slaps you and says “Boy wat da fuq do you think ur doin!?”
[THE-KRIS] [03:35 pm] : “You lucky to be alive black amigo!”
[THE-KRIS] [03:36 pm] : “Now get yo shit togeva, the mexicans are cumin to finish yo ass off”
[THE-KRIS] [03:36 pm] : what do you do?
! Viper. [03:36 pm] : “whaz up ma black amigo” - In his best white boy voice.
! [THE-KRIS] [03:36 pm] : “Let’s get out of here” He says to you in a stern bassy voice.
[THE-KRIS] [03:36 pm] : What do you do?
! Viper. [03:37 pm] : I tell the black guy to lead the way.
! [THE-KRIS] [03:38 pm] : You follow the black guy out of the shower room and out onto the courtyard. There you see all of your cell mates working out and playing some b-ball.
[THE-KRIS] [03:38 pm] : the mexicans are all sat around there table and notice you
[THE-KRIS] [03:38 pm] : they just stare
[THE-KRIS] [03:38 pm] : what do you do?
! Viper. [03:38 pm] : Start break dancing.
Viper. [03:38 pm] : (I’m such a cool cellmate)
[THE-KRIS] [03:39 pm] : You start break dancing on the courtyard. Still naked covered in soap.
[THE-KRIS] [03:39 pm] : Everybody just watches. One mexican comes over to you and joins in.
[THE-KRIS] [03:39 pm] : the black guy starts eye-ing up the other mexicans
! Viper. [03:39 pm] : I wink to the black guy to shank the guy.
! [THE-KRIS] [03:39 pm] : the other black guys stand around watching his back, waiting for somebody to be race traitor.
[THE-KRIS] [03:40 pm] : The black guy shanks the mexican guy
[THE-KRIS] [03:40 pm] : all of the mexicans come running over and begin bwarling with the black guys
[THE-KRIS] [03:40 pm] : what do you do?
! Viper. [03:40 pm] : I sneak the duck out of there, and steal a gun off the prison guards who are watching the fight.
! [THE-KRIS] [03:41 pm] : The prison guard notices you trying to steal his gun and hits you with the butt of his rifle
! Viper. [03:41 pm] : (Dang should have carried on break dancing)
! [THE-KRIS] [03:41 pm] : you wake up in the prison’s infirmary with a fractured skull, still naked
[THE-KRIS] [03:41 pm] : You look around, see a chest of drawes, a door, and some other patients
[THE-KRIS] [03:42 pm] : what do you do?
! Viper. [03:42 pm] : I stand up on the table, then stage dive head first on to the concrete floor.
Viper. [03:42 pm] : (Has anyone noticed I should be a script writer for Saints Row? LOL
! [THE-KRIS] [03:43 pm] : as you attempt to stage dive, your foot slips and instead you belly flop the concrete floor.
[THE-KRIS] [03:43 pm] : Now in pain and with a broken nos from the impact
[THE-KRIS] [03:43 pm] : you stand back up and take another look around the room
[THE-KRIS] [03:43 pm] : You see a chest of drawes, a door, and some other patients. what do you do?
! Viper. [03:43 pm] : Run out the room screaming OMG ZOMBIES YO!
! [THE-KRIS] [03:44 pm] : You run out of the room naked screaming “OMG ZOMBIES YO!” one of the doctors tranquilizes you and sends you
[THE-KRIS] [03:44 pm] : back to your bed in the infirmary.
[THE-KRIS] [03:45 pm] : You wake up 8horus later. the guard says, you have 2 hours left before you’ll be heading for the electric chair
[THE-KRIS] [03:45 pm] : he leaves the room. You look around, you see a chest of draws. Your final meal, no cuttelry, and your cells bars. what do you do?
! Viper. [03:46 pm] : Shout after him that I was promised some banging tunes.
! [THE-KRIS] [03:46 pm] : He returns with a busted old radio and puts it down just outside of your cell bars, playing nothing but white noise
! Viper. [03:46 pm] : What does the final meal contain, and whats in the Chest of Drawers and what are they made out of?
! [THE-KRIS] [03:46 pm] : He looks at you and says “The only banging you will be getting, is that from the devil in hell.”
! Viper. [03:47 pm] : Are the cell bars edible?
! [THE-KRIS] [03:47 pm] : The final meal is a piece of chicken breast. And bread.
[THE-KRIS] [03:47 pm] : with some lettuce.
[THE-KRIS] [03:47 pm] : The chest of draws are metal and bolted to the floor and walls
[THE-KRIS] [03:47 pm] : The bars are not edible.
[THE-KRIS] [03:47 pm] : What do you do?
! Viper. [03:48 pm] : /Wear chicken breast.
! [THE-KRIS] [03:48 pm] : You place the chicken breast on your head. There is no other place you can wear it where it will stay.
[THE-KRIS] [03:48 pm] : +1 Head Armor.
[THE-KRIS] [03:48 pm] : What do you do?
[THE-KRIS] [03:49 pm] : hint look in the draws
! Viper. [03:49 pm] : uhhhmmmmmm, look in the drawers? While nibbling on the bread.
! [THE-KRIS] [03:50 pm] : As you nibble the bread, you open the draws. The contants are: One set of prison clothes, one set of standard shoes, a packet of cigarettes, 2 matches, a striker, and a spoon
[THE-KRIS] [03:50 pm] : What do you do?
! Viper. [03:52 pm] : Pile the clothes by the doorway, put the shoes on… I then proceed to use the spoon to tap S.O.S on the cell bars.
! [THE-KRIS] [03:52 pm] : You put on ythe shoes. +2 foot armor
[THE-KRIS] [03:53 pm] : You begin tapping on the bars. The guards comes by and hits your hand holding the spoon with his trungeon. Breaking your hand.
[THE-KRIS] [03:53 pm] : What do you do?
! Viper. [03:54 pm] : Start laughing and calling him a poonbox, because he wont come and give me an arm wrestle.
! [THE-KRIS] [03:54 pm] : The guard then agrees to your arm wrestle. Another guard scomes over to supervise. they bring a table into your cell and two chairs.
[THE-KRIS] [03:54 pm] : The first guard sits down
[THE-KRIS] [03:55 pm] : what do you do?
! Viper. [03:55 pm] : Slide of the matches in to my pocket, and use the other to light the clothes I put by the door.
! [THE-KRIS] [03:56 pm] : The guard sat down tazers you whilst the other puts out the clothes
[THE-KRIS] [03:56 pm] : they handcuff you and take you to the electric chair. moving your time forward an hour
[THE-KRIS] [03:56 pm] : they knock you out and wait for the audience to arrive
[THE-KRIS] [03:56 pm] : you wake up strapped into the chair awaiting death, starring at the faces of the families of the victims your murdere.
[THE-KRIS] [03:57 pm] : what do you do?
! Viper. [03:57 pm] : lol.
! [THE-KRIS] [03:57 pm] : You laugh out loud.
[THE-KRIS] [03:57 pm] : the audience begins heckling you, “BURN IN HELL YOU whisker biscuit!”
[THE-KRIS] [03:57 pm] : the guard then turns on the power
[THE-KRIS] [03:57 pm] : you feel the electricity surge through your body as you cling on to your life
[THE-KRIS] [03:58 pm] : slowly, you feel yourself fading away
[THE-KRIS] [03:58 pm] : you are dead.
[THE-KRIS] [03:58 pm] : Game Over.

- Matthew -'s Escape the Demonic Bedroom.

>! ```
[THE-KRIS] [12:29 am] : Name: ? Age: ? Difficulty: Easy, Normal, Insane?
>! - Matthew - [12:30 am] : Name: "Jeff" Age: 2 Difficulty: Insane
>! [THE-KRIS] [12:30 am] : Game Title: Escape The Demonic Bedroom
>! [THE-KRIS] [12:31 am] : You wake up in your crib, nothing but a few names, "Jeff, Mommy, and Uncle Steve"
[THE-KRIS] [12:31 am] : You look around
[THE-KRIS] [12:31 am] : You see a blanket,a plastic screwriver, and your most loyal companion, Teddy.
[THE-KRIS] [12:31 am] : What do you do?
>! - Matthew - [12:32 am] : I escape the demonic bedroom.
>! [THE-KRIS] [12:32 am] : You attempt to escape from teh bedroom. You are stopped by the bars of your crib
[THE-KRIS] [12:32 am] : what do you do?
>! - Matthew - [12:32 am] : Kick down the bars of my crib and escape the demonic bedroom.
>! [THE-KRIS] [12:33 am] : You attempt to kick the bars on the crib in order to escape. You get a splinter in your foot. - 3 health.
[THE-KRIS] [12:33 am] : You look around again.
[THE-KRIS] [12:33 am] : You see your blanket, a screwdriver, and your most trustworthy companion, Teddy.
[THE-KRIS] [12:33 am] : What do you do?
>! - Matthew - [12:35 am] : I use the screwdriver to disassemble my crib. I put the pieces back in the original packaging.
>! [THE-KRIS] [12:35 am] : You fumble with yourplastic screwdriver, however you do not have the knowledge to dissasemble the crib. you don't even know how to say the word diassemble. You start chewing on your screwdriver with frustration.
[THE-KRIS] [12:35 am] : What do you do?
>! - Matthew - [12:36 am] : I ask teddy to do it for me.
>! [THE-KRIS] [12:36 am] : You ask your most loyal companion for help. Teddy says to you "Jeff, first you must cuddle me!"
[THE-KRIS] [12:36 am] : What do you do?
>! - Matthew - [12:36 am] : Cry for mommy because that's never happened before.
>! [THE-KRIS] [12:37 am] : Your father comes to see what you are crying about
[THE-KRIS] [12:37 am] : Your mother left to buy cigarettes 3 months ago
[THE-KRIS] [12:37 am] : your father picks you up and rocks you.
[THE-KRIS] [12:38 am] : Rubs your back, and you burp. He then puts you down by your lettered cubes playset.
[THE-KRIS] [12:38 am] : What do you do?
>! - Matthew - [12:39 am] : I use the screwdriver to impale my arm.
>! [THE-KRIS] [12:39 am] : You reach for your screwdriver, however it is just out of reach inside your crib.
[THE-KRIS] [12:39 am] : Teddy suggests you look around.
[THE-KRIS] [12:39 am] : What do you do?
>! - Matthew - [12:40 am] : I go to sleep, because I'm a baby.
>! [THE-KRIS] [12:41 am] : You go to sleep. Your father picks you up and puts you back inside your crib. Tucks you in and locks your door and window as he's overprotective.
[THE-KRIS] [12:41 am] : In the middle of the night, 11pm, the demonic creatures of your bedroom come out
[THE-KRIS] [12:41 am] : you struggle, unable to scream. You hide under your blanky and cling on to Teddy
[THE-KRIS] [12:41 am] : the creatures smother you.
[THE-KRIS] [12:41 am] : You are dead.
[THE-KRIS] [12:41 am] : Game Over.

Artix: The Demon Mirror

! ```
Player: Artix, Game: The Demon Mirror

[THE-KRIS] [12:10 am] : You wake up in your bed. Look around your room, everything seems normal, you see your television, SNES, your drawes
[THE-KRIS] [12:10 am] : and in the corner a mirror.
[THE-KRIS] [12:10 am] : However, when you look in the mirror, you see a small girl staring back at you.
[THE-KRIS] [12:10 am] : What do you do?

artix5455 [12:10 am] : ok i go play my snes

[THE-KRIS] [12:11 am] : You turn the snes on, Zelda: A Link To The Past is currently in. When the game boots up you notice something odd. your save file is gone.
[THE-KRIS] [12:11 am] : All that appears is a single save file
[THE-KRIS] [12:11 am] : Titled “Nicky.”
[THE-KRIS] [12:11 am] : What do you do?

artix5455 [12:11 am] : i say DAMN IT SNES AND YOU SHORT TERM MEMREY

[THE-KRIS] [12:11 am] : You shout at the snes. nothing happens.
[THE-KRIS] [12:11 am] : What do you do?

artix5455 [12:11 am] : i make a new file

[THE-KRIS] [12:12 am] : you create a new file on your game. The SNES crashes, you attempt to tun it back on but it doesn’t work. You’ve broken it.
[THE-KRIS] [12:12 am] : What do you do next?

artix5455 [12:12 am] : i open it

[THE-KRIS] [12:13 am] : You try to open the snes. you don’t have a screwdriver. You put it back down…
[THE-KRIS] [12:13 am] : what do you do?

artix5455 [12:13 am] : i say screw you stupid snes im getting a xbox
artix5455 [12:13 am] : and i watch some tv

[THE-KRIS] [12:13 am] : You shout at the snes. you attempt to turn on the TV. nothing happens
[THE-KRIS] [12:14 am] : hint common actions : Look Around, Look Inside of #, Examine #, Open #. Etc.

artix5455 [12:14 am] : i open the drwer

[THE-KRIS] [12:14 am] : You open your draws. You see some clothing. Nothing out of the ordinary. What do you do?

artix5455 [12:15 am] : i close the drwer and and go look at my sexy self in the mirro

[THE-KRIS] [12:16 am] : You look in the mirror. You reflection stands behind the little girl. Still just staring at you. She holds her hand up to the surface of the mirror.

artix5455 [12:16 am] : i tell her to move so i can look at my sefl
artix5455 [12:16 am] : and
artix5455 [12:17 am] : i get a cross and exorsium her ass

[THE-KRIS] [12:17 am] : You tell the girl to move. you take a wooden cross hanging on your bedroom wall and hold it up to the mirror. She stares back at you. Opens her mouth. And lets out a scream

! ! [THE-KRIS] [12:17 am] : !
[THE-KRIS] [12:17 am] : The scream never seems to end.
[THE-KRIS] [12:17 am] : What do you do?

artix5455 [12:18 am] : i trow the cross at her then brake the shit out of that mirror
artix5455 [12:19 am] : i leave to go buy a xbox 360

[THE-KRIS] [12:18 am] : You throw the cross at the mirror… The glass shatters across the floor
[THE-KRIS] [12:19 am] : you look away to shield yourself from the glass. You turn back around. The girl is there, standing in the frame of the now broken mirror.
[THE-KRIS] [12:19 am] : the takes a step out and stands infront of you.
[THE-KRIS] [12:19 am] : You attempt to leve to buy an xbox. the door is locked.
[THE-KRIS] [12:19 am] : what do you do?

artix5455 [12:19 am] : i unlock it

[THE-KRIS] [12:20 am] : You attempt to open the door. Nothing happens. it won’t budge. you turn back around, the girl is staring back at you holding a screwdriver in her hand.

artix5455 [12:20 am] : i take it and say thanks now i can open my snes
artix5455 [12:20 am] : i
artix5455 [12:20 am] : sitll have that cross
artix5455 [12:21 am] : so if she
artix5455 [12:21 am] : get close to me she get hurt

[THE-KRIS] [12:21 am] : You take the screwdriver from the girl and move over to your snes, holding on to your cross in hope that it may keep her away.
[THE-KRIS] [12:21 am] : as you kneel down to open up your snes. The girl picks up a piece of the shattered glass.
[THE-KRIS] [12:21 am] : Grabs your head, and drives it into your throat.

! ```

[THE-KRIS] [12:22 am] :  Game Over.
>! ```

I was expecting to see Artix :[

I was expecting to see Artix :[

ikr i want a adventure

Dang man. I lasted longer than -Matthew-!

Dang man. I lasted longer than -Matthew-!

You slut.

You slut.

Your just well jel that you didn’t even get picked! ;)

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